The future of monthly gatherings. Where do u suggest we hold our gatherings?

Many of SHC monthly gatherings are held at food courts. Reasons include flexibility of dates, seats, choice of food and choice of prices.

But often there are not enough seats to sit together as a big group. Foodcourts tends to focus on us if we dont order foods or drinks. Worse, if we bring food.

Price-wise, food courts are varied, and prices vary from less than $10 to $20 for a dish and one drink.

Noise wise, we can be very noisy as a group.

Location, we usually choose food courts near a MRT.

Date/time, we usually choose a weekend, and around 2pm – 5pm. Means we skip busy lunch and dinner hours.

What can we do? What do you suggest for future gatherings?

Terence Seah

Author: Terence Seah


45 thoughts on “The future of monthly gatherings. Where do u suggest we hold our gatherings?”

  1. Hi Terence & fellow Shc members,I’m Eileen Tan.This is my 1st time trying to post here.I rarely visit this website.Let it be a TEST.Will try to come in more often & contribute if I can.
    Wow!so many opinions from our members..Will take time to read through.Wish everyone well.Good bye.

  2. Going to Kota Tinggi, Mount Kinabalu. Tioman can be added. Once we got 12 locations we can plan for next year.
    Now we need to dig out those born under the various zodiac sign and we got a full calendar for next year.

  3. It would be good to list here all those favourite spot to meet:
    1. Botanic Garden
    2. Garden by the Bay
    3. Singapore Airport
    4. Sentosa
    5. Trip to JB
    Any more suggestions?
    We cannot do away with monthly gatherings as we need a venue for old and new members to meet.

  4. If we want to try out according to district we need to plan for next year.
    Identify those born under the star of Aquarius. Appoint a leader to gather volunteers to plan for that month.

  5. Hi All,
    One way to solve this large gathering problem is to “de-centralised”. This mean, anyone want to come forward to lead has to find his own time, venue, etc. to convene his/her gathering.
    Any SHC member who wish to join that particular gathering need only to inform through SHC web site.

    Size of group can limit to 10 in order not to disturb the peace of the free venue.

    To simplify matters, good that this “EO” fix a certain day/time of month & venue for the gathering.

    1. Hew Lee,

      Yes, our montjly gatherings can be decentralised. Very much will depend on the organiser EO.

      Small groups of 10 pax are also fine.

      Any EO can pick up this suggestion. Let’s see the response. Tq for your idea.

      Terence Seah

  6. Foodcourts are business entities and not a place for BIG group to gather for their own agenda, unless it is to patronise the stalls.

    EO also cannot reserve chairs and tables . Also SHC does not have the right to demarcate spaces and disturb the quiet use of the food court.

    Usually, the participants will gather in own niche groups and leaving new members completely lost and wandering. Ofcause, those with great social skills will break the ice faster ; but will still need time and timing.

    Guess no need for the big group to gather every month, an annual or bi-annual event would do.

    Can have small meets , say on even days of the week at a convenient point
    to enlarge the social circle. No necessity for intense planning and venue sourcing.

    A Whatsapp LINK to iinform and invite attendees would be good. Members can chat and get to know one another even before the physical meet. This will facilitate blending-in more quickly and pick out common interest.

    Terence , as Admin, can continue to exercise the No Politics, No Religion etc by shelving those out of this line.

    1. Hi Wen,

      Many members form small groups, and gather. This has worked very well.

      Food courts are flexible. But as always, the organiser gets to decide the place, date and time.

      I am for the idea to have other locations. Again. The organiser can decide.

  7. My 2-cents worth feedback:-

    Someone quoted “The idea of monthly gathering is to find your own kakis” to mingle with, be it long-term or short-term or new found ones.

    My overall thoughts are: –
    1. Celebrate joint Birthday month cum Monthly Meeting, at least there is a purpose for meet up. Get those Birthday babies to rope in their own kakis. It would be good if the EO’s Bday falls on the month.
    2. Announce or put up a post in Forum your intended month (Date/Time/Location) to host the monthly meeting. Bear in mind, it is a casual meeting and not an extravaganza event.
    3. I wouldn’t call it a REGISTRATION coz it is a Free n Easy rendezvous
    4. Can give us a name list on who is going on that day, so EO will roughly know how many going, of coz must be SHC but then again, if it is a food court you can’t chase their non-SHC partner away.
    5. Good to expose their partners (male or female) about SHC such fun club and who knows more will join.
    6. Food Court is an eating place and not a place to only chit chat, go grab some food and give businesses to the outlets.
    7. Alternatively, can get a F&B place and called it an High-Tea EVENT with food provide with a considerable fee attached. Nothing is Free in this world.

    DanielC, did a very good SOP but it should run in our blood when it comes to etiquette e.g. put back chairs or straighten tables and of coz a THANK You to the cleaners.

    Most importantly all member enjoyed themselves with a positive mindset.


    1. Sally, good idea,. We can let the EO decide to have a birthday celebration. It is EO’s decision.

      Lets ask the Sep EO.

      Terence Seah

  8. Terrace, a suggestion.
    There are 12 months in a year. If we can appoint 12 coordinators from 12 district each to be in charge of a certain month.. This will solve your headaches.
    The selected will gather his constituency members to plan and suggest for that month.

    1. Hi Dan,

      Good idea. In fact, we have been trying to group by zones. The response has been rather quiet. We discuss this issue in thus forum many times.

      Maybe I didnt do a good job. Try to get 12 EOs. Members will support the monthly gathering.

      Terence Seah

  9. Explicitly stated by Terence or otherwise, a responsible EO does this :
    Keep tab of the registration list (make sure the names are spelled correctly)
    Make sure they are SHC members
    Make sure the maximum number is not exceeded
    Make sure the place can accommodate the number
    Think of fun and games so participants will not be bored

    (On the day itself)
    Be the FIRST to arrive to ensure the place is ready
    Chope tables/chairs
    Make sure incoming participants are online-registered
    Make sure they are members
    Encourage/prompt participants to buy something (gao guan lah)
    Remind participants not to be too noisy and rowdy
    Answer phone messages from people who are lost somewhere, “how to go huh?”

    (At the end of event)
    Remind participants to tidy the place.
    Put back the chairs. Straighten the tables.
    Apologise to stall holders and cleaners
    Be the LAST to leave after checking everything is ok.
    Be prepared to hear feedback like,
    “Food so expensive”,
    “So crowded”,
    “The EO is so confused” and
    “Why did he hold it here? Should hold it there lah”.

    And what does a participant do?
    Put his name on the list and wait for the BIG day.

    (The day itself)
    Go if nothing better to do. Otherwise, just say, “sorry…have another commitment”. Arrive at the place, look around for friends and buddies. Choose a good seat. Buy a drink or two. Talk. Take pictures.

    (At the end of event)
    Pat your backside and go. And wonder aloud, “when and where is the next meeting huh?”

    Terence wants something every month. He always starts something and hopes someone will catch the ball and be the EO. But who wants to be EO? At his age now, Terence need not go thru that periodic cycle each and every month. Can be painful. Perhaps men need no pause.

    Let’s try to help our Chief.

    1. This is one of the best feedback on this forum. Tq DanielC.

      DanielC is one our most observant supporter and critical member of all things happening in SHC.

      Read what he says and give us your feedback

      Terence Seah

  10. Nice try Terence. You are desperate for an EO aren’t you? Even if I were to accept it this time, what about the future months? Your problem is not solved.

    Anyway, I already said I don’t like the idea of a monthly gathering.
    B Garden is a beautiful public garden. One of my favourite strolling places. But as far as I am concerned, three is a crowd.

    You have hundreds of members, if not thousands. And you said they “like monthly gatherings”. Whoever likes the idea should be the EO. Doing the job you like is an enjoyment. Don’t be shy, indeed .

    Seriously, why the need for an EO in the first place? I think it is silly. Nobody owes anybody an outing. And nobody owes anybody a song or a game. Whoever free can just pop in anytime. Buses and trains are so convenient. I may saunter by and take some fresh air, if I am not in JB.
    And have a leisure-stroll with the person I like.


  11. Yes Terence. I enjoy exchanging ideas and opinions with you. Keep my brain active lah.

    Over the years, I noted your management philosophy is,
    “you talk you do lah”.

    That does not deter me from offering a solution to your problem when you ask.. Yes I know a problem when I see one. Keeping mum is not my forte.

    You still call the final shot. We agree to disagree ( haha this over-used phrase again ).

    Like everybody, I am anxious to know who the next EO is, if any. Good luck.


    1. Hi Daniel, in Aug, we have our monthly day at the Bontanic Garden, from 7 am.

      This location is suggested by members. Great open space, also good for some walking, a good start to be a breakfast gathering, close to Botanic Garden MRT.

      As the space is wide and central, I see this date and place as a suitable place for a family meetup. A fun place to bring out the grandchildren, nice for our children to meet up, and an occasion to bring out our parents and grandparents.

      Would you like to be the EO? You can organise some games. Try it, dont be shy. OK?

      Terence Seah

        1. We can pick a place for gathering without a EO is also fun too.
          Those wish to come jus come.
          Not interested is OK
          So simple.
          Why argue about EO.
          Every month jus pick a location for those who are interested, jus come.
          Cheers !

  12. Terence. Thank you for your indulgence. Before we get off tangent, let’s return to what has prompted this exchange of ideas. If you scroll up to your main bulletin above , you have highlighted, among other things, the following puzzles, “What can we do? What do you suggest for future gatherings?” Obviously something is not right, and I offer my explanation – and hopefully a solution.

    Personally I do not like the idea of a “monthly gathering”, so asking me to be an EO for such an event is irrelevant. Why the need when we are already doing it in small groups? Struggling to find and EO and a place to house so many people is your monthly pain. Everybody is waiting for you to get an EO and a good place.

    As for having a “Club House”, I did suggest to you 5 or 6 years ago. I said, “Tell all members to use the Han’s Cafe at basement 2, Chinatown Point as the de-facto meeting place”. The declaration must come from you, the Chief. You did not buy the idea and hence I let the matter rest. And the problem is not solved.

    Five years from today, probably you will ask us the same questions, “What can we do? What do you suggest for future gatherings?”
    Guess who will reply you?


    1. Daniel,

      I do enjoy this conversation with you. I like asking for ideas.

      I dont know if members like the idea of scrapping the monthly gathering. However we make attending the monthly gathering optional. You are free not to attend. The EO decides the place, date and time. We have been holding the monthly for the last 16 years, it has gone well, so I am unlikely to cancel the item.

      I love to have a club house. However the club has dicussed this topic a few times, and for financial reasons, we have never been able to kick this idea off. You were also part of the discussion. And you were unable to lead this project. I am still open to hear any updates from you on starting a club house.

      SHC members live in all corners of Singapore. Feedback from members indicate preference to hold the monthly gatherings at different area. Cola and Howard took the initiative to recommend new areas. And I intend to use their recommendations. I hope you will offer ideas and suggestions.

      Terence Seah

  13. From early 2020 to late 2021, we were close, although physically miles apart. Thanks to Terence and Zoom. Ironically, the pandemic lockdown enabled us to know more new members than before, and several quality ones. Thankful to the few whom have had helped in administrative works. Now that the lockdown is eased, Zoom has lost its focus. We are back to merry making.

    There is nothing wrong with gathering a group of good old friends regularly together, for food and fun. Targeted, preferred and exclusive. Many of us are doing just that, in small groups, and off line (unreported).

    However, doing it online, and declaring it to the entire Club by the Chief himself is another matter. Where is the objective of “meeting more and new friends” ? when each time an event is splashed online, the same people (almost) fill up the list, fast and furious.

    The apparently constant intake of new members seems only to add to the big pool of audience, to witness yet another performance by the niche group.

    New members may be too scare or too shy to break into the “inner chamber”, and assuming they do manage to squeeze through, can hardly jostle for a good spot to have a photo-shot with the “emperor”.

    There must be a better way to induce and induct new members. Herein lies our noble objective, or the lack of it.

    Where is our de-facto “Club House” ?

  14. Thanks Terence. I always speak my mind. Grateful you have a listening ear. Of course, action is another matter as you have different considerations.

    NO. There is no way to overcome public attention or onlookers gripe and jeer when we continue doing what we are doing. People have every right to feel irritated. On previous such meetings, I have heard rumblings from the cleaners, stall holders and diners seated nearby. Of course, we can choose to ignore them, unless and until the owner of the establishment explicitly cautions us.

    A gathering for all members? Nice try in theory. We know jolly well it would be impossible to accommodate even 5% of the entire club size if they were to turn up (we have several thousand members, don’t we?) and we know it is more or less the same people each and every month. So it begs the question – what is the purpose of this monthly gathering – or meeting?

    In social clubs, such as SAFRC, SCDFC, NUSAC, NTUCC etc, where there are thousands of members, you don’t see them having a meeting intended for ALL members. The only time is when there is an AGM or EOGM, where a proper place is booked to discuss serious matters. Otherwise, members gather freely and in small groups, either at the Club premises or elsewhere.

    We can create a de-facto destination for members to meet. No EO. No registration. No games to attract anybody. We are well passed such inducements. Saunter in anytime, order a drink and you may find a member or two at another table. Move over and say Hi and strike a conversation (we shall discuss how to identify each other). He or she may be a new member, a total stranger. This is how we meet new members and this should be our objective.

    1. In fact, members can gather anyday, anytime, anywhere. This is already happening in many groups at different places. And I personally encourage these gatherings. Such groups do not need registration. It is up to the organiser.

      At Club level, we encourage as many members as we can to join in a monthly gathering at different places in Singapore.

      If we use the same food court regularly, we can get kicked out. Well, we do not use the same place for monthly gatherings. Haha, I will be surprised if Food Republic or Kopitiam makes an announcement to ban SHC from their premises.

      Of course, we dont want to be a nuisance to the foodcourt and their diners.

      Our members are busy and have plenty of activities. They usually know when they are available, closer to the gathering date.

      EOs need to manage the numbers, anywhere between 0 and 100? This is why I raise the topic of future gatherings. How about some suggestions? How about putting up the hand to organise a monthly gathering?

  15. When you have 50 or more people gathered in an open outdoor area – beach, park, garden etc – it is a public attraction. Onlookers grin and cheer.
    When you have 50 or more people gathered in an enclosed business area – coffee shop, food court etc – it is a public nuisance. Onlookers gripe and jeer.

    1. Cola, you have a good suggestion about using the Botanic Gardens for one of our mthly gatherings.

      Yes, we can bring a mat and bring our own food and drinks.

      The date I am looking is Tue 9 Aug 2022, National day.

      Which part of Botanic Gardens is a good place to meet? 7am – 11 am. Hot and shady.

  16. 1. Hold outdoor like park bring your own floor mat.
    2. Cinema
    3. Community centre
    4. Shopping mall
    5. Condo club house
    6. IKEA
    7. Coffeeshop
    8. Rental space
    9. Class room courses
    10. Pasar Malam

    1. Restrict to smaller group 40pax
    2. Improvise guideline for no shower and event crasher. Without registration.
    3. Token fee for EO effort and organize

    1. Howard,. Tq for your suggestions. Very often, our difficulty is to get an EO. He/she gets to decide the place. Date and time.

      Perhaps, the next EO may consider some of your suggestions.

      Do let me know if you can also help find an EO.

      1. Hi Terence, thank you for adding me to the SHC group. I have worked out a proposal for meetup at a private venue. Wanna post up the event but cant seems to find my way ard it. $10 a pax with 3finger food and a drink. Min 35pax, max 40paxs.

    2. Howard, I am impressed at your recommendations for locations to hold our monthly gatherings. I like the coffee shop idea.

      Howard, and members, can you suggest a large coffee shop with nice ZheChar at about $150 per round table, include 1 drink. I mean a large coffee shop

      Members get to form their own group of 10. We can try this idea out.

      Terence Seah

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