Inquiry into member abuse of another member

There has been reports of member abuse by one member to another new member, involving a SHC activity.

Evidence given to me confirmed the use of abuse words.

I have given the person until tomorrow 20 Aug 2022 6pm to give full details why I should not terminate his SHC membership.

If details are not given, the termination is effective 20 Aug 2022 6pm.

Upon termination, this person will be withdrawn from all whatsapp groups, club forum and facebook. No participation in any club activity. There will be an announcement, upon termination.

Terence Seah

Author: Terence Seah

Founder

4 thoughts on “Inquiry into member abuse of another member”

  1. Fairy Godmother is lazing in bed, she wakes up only for lunch and dinner. I have decided not to disturb her on SHC matters.

    I have gone over the recent abuse case, and have decided not to ban this member. Sorry, I do not give reasons for this decision.

    The said person has been given a warning to not use abusive and threatening words with other members.

    We have formed SHC to what it is today, and anti-social behaviour does not help us fulfil our club objective.

    There are legal recourse, if any member chooses to take the legal route.

    We are all over 45, and getting old too.

    Terence Seah

  2. Investigation into almost all complaints of harassments, resulting in threats and reports to the police arise with a few members.

    Every case have a background, which close member friends know, but are always quiet.

    Many cases are emotions related, and it is difficult to say who is right and who is wrong. Even if an incident arises, it may have started long ago.

    We must try not to agitate any quarrels, and support a one sided view point.

    Some friends work in the background to support one party, making the case for right against wrong lopsided.

    There is always a right and there is a wrong. In recent cases, I have heard of some unacceptable cases.

    I usually have the following thinking.

    1. I do listen to member’s reported issues. But I do not decide on quarrels, even harassements. This club has no resolution department. This is a social club, membership is free and all members are required to be socialable and respect one another.

    2. Singapore has laws. If needs be, there is the police and there are civil courts.

    3. I have a private life. 30% of my time I spend on my business and work. 30% I engage in SHC activities. 10% of my life is spent at dialysis. And some amount on sleep.

    How much more do some members expect me to spend on resolving members unhappiness and quarrels.

    4. If some members wish to have a resolutions committee or have someone to decide and say, you are wrong, you are sentensed for 1 year, banned from SHC, I can consider. Pls let me know.

    5. Fairy Godmother is still sleeping. Worst winter is coming. She can wake up anytime. I have just taken her off her sleeping pills prescription

    Pls resolve your quarrels among your parties. The SHC forum is not a place for attacks on one another. And I have no objections if any member wishes to leave the club because he/she is unhappy with another member.

    Terence Seah

    1. Hi Lydia,

      Comments and suggestions are always welcome.

      As far as this topic is concerned, the club does not accept using this forum to attack or reference to any individual.

      Terence Seah

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