Hi,
needless to say both of us are new here. We have always planned for retirement but never knew the days pass so slowly there is nothing much to do except to watch the second hand of the clock rotates 60 x 60 x24 for a day if makes us giddy and we take turns watching the second hand so we will not MISS a second we want to see life NOW, not wait until we can move and have to watch DVD to see the world we have a bit of savings and hopeful that it will stretch for a long time
we feel that one lifetime is a very short span of time- Working everyday is not a bad thing but it robs us of at least 8 – 12 precious hours in the most useful time of our lves. yes we need to make a living but building those wealth in excess of our needs … are these actions necessary when we go we can take them with us so that in our next life we can be benefit from this incredible feat of saving. we have friends who have a mearge family income and top it off they have a large family… yet they are very happy because they are not attracted to the material things in life such as LCD TV and so on each weekend they spend quality time with the family by the beach or the park
I think we need to really stop and time. we need to care very much what others think of us. our happiness and destiny are in our own very hands. why we need to conform to others if we are not doing anything that is against the law
we need to be free from these social and peer pressure. the 5 C’s for instant. we consider ourselves lucky to be able to see these things and put them to action but our friends would consider us NUTS giving up a high paying job for doing nothing at home. believe me our relationship as husband and wife has improved by leaps and bounds. we begin to realise that we have been selfish in pursuing our careers without giving much thoughts to the family because we keep telling ourselves ….. just a few years more
be kind to yourself and start living like a human being and not be a SLAVE OF OUR SOCIETY WHERE money and power seems to be placed above love, friendship, kindness and forgiveness. we are just two humble human beings in this sea of people trying to be ourselves
thank you
Good morning Lawerence & Theresa,
You have come to the right place. Here we all believe that there is more to life than just work and making money.
I share your thoughts on life , its meaning and purpose AND so does many other SHCs you will soon meet.
cheers & have fun
charles
Hi Lawrence and Theresa, thanks for sharing with us your thoughts on life.
I share the view that we do not have to overwork ourselves to amass wealth for ourselves (for we cannot take our mansions and bank vaults along) or the next generation (as the next generation will take care of itself).
And yes, we will enjoy the little joys during the journey of life and not wait for happiness as though it is a destination…
Joy
Hi Lawrence and Theresa.
If every couple thought and felt the way you’ve both expressed yourself, there would be fewer divorces and marital breakdowns.
Welcome :-)
Mary
Hi Lawrence and Theresa
Life is all about making choices. One has to make a conscious choice to pursue or not to pursue a meaningful and purposeful life. Life is both a journey and destination. One could choose to enjoy the journey or the destination. The choice is really yours. I fully agree with you that the purpose of living is not merely to amass material wealth but also pursue non-material goals. Our 3 concerns in modern living are Material wealth, physical and spiritual health. The sum of which is lasting and eternal wealth. It sometimes takes us old folks to realise the wisdom.
many many thanks to all your kind encouraging words of wisdom
it is a very painful but yet satisfying step
hope we are not making a mistake
keeping our fingers cross
anybody thought of retiring in Malaysia with malaysia offering malaysia my 2nd home incentives
would appreciate your kind expert input on this issue thanks
Hi Lawrence & Theresa,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
We agree with you.
We also chose earlier retirement so that we could have a better quality life. Although we no longer have the income that we used to enjoy, we have no regret.
We have lots of couple time, travelling and doing things together. Although we do have a loving relationship for >3 decades,our relationship as a couple becomes even better after our retirement :)
We are looking forward to a 4-day Cruise on 28 Oct 07. Would we be able to do that if we were still working?
Once someone asked, “What a waste to give up a steady job & income!! Why don’t you continue working part time?”
Answer: “I have very few needs. If I can live a happy and contented life on $10 a day, why would I want to work for another $10 which I don’t need?”
Hope to meet up with both of you at an SHC event.
Cheers!
Philip & Priscilla Wee
Yes, I concur on the fact that both Philip & Priscilla are a wonderfully happy & contented couple………..
Heee, where to find my better half and then retire too on a more princely sum of $15 a day…………….?
All of you are so kind and sweet
it is making this painful transition less painful
we have been married since 1988 that would mean we are nearly married for 20 years
we meet in school during our university days
special thanks to Philip and Priscilla
Welcome Lawrence & Theresa,
So glad to know that you two University Sweethearts will be celebrating your 20th Wedding Anniversary soon :)
Congratulations !
Philip & Priscilla Wee
Lawrence and Theresa, Phlip and Priscilla….jia you!!!! achah!!! Love is such a beautiful thing esp in our autumn years!! :-))) I am a romantic at heart, I love reading Mills and Boons whn I was young :-))
These are really “heng pern” sayings….:
-Our happiness and destiny are in our own very hands
-Life is alll abt making choices
We make choices to improve, to be better people but sometimes it is difficult to put that into action :-)). I am an imperfect person. :-) Reading the above comments, I marvel at the thought of how hving more time tog has improved “our relationship as husband and wife by leaps and bounds” and how “earlier retirement” leads to “a better quality life” between husband and wife. I can’t imagine that with my husband:-))) We will be bickering the whole day!!!! or rather I will be bickering with him most of the time:-))) Frankly, my husband is a nice guy but we are as diff as chalk and cheese:-)). Btw we are married for almost 30 years! But I choose to be happy. I choose not to let “ugly” moments stay with me for more than 2 days:-). Like what sgzitan said..just a few years more….therefor anger and ugly stuff must take a backseat. I choose to focus on the good times with family and friends.
Therefore I look out for fun events in SHC, to let my hair down, to be young and ridiculous again, without my husband around :-)))). (Aside: My weekends are spend with family and doing housework).
Wishing you Lawrence and Theresa, Philip and Priscilla and other SHC couples beautiful days ahead….Keep on holding hands!!! JiaYou!!! :-))) (Aside: I will keep holding hands with my hubby too :-)))
Hi Lawrence and Theresa,
My wife, Kristy and I, are able to identify with you. We too met each other at NUS way back in 1981. She was a young student of 20 years of age while I was a mature undergraduate at 39 years old. We got hitched to each other in 1987 after 6 years of relationship. Like both of you we celebrated our 20th anniversary in June this year. We have a son, Nicholas, who is now 19 years old. He is in his final year in Nanyang Polytechnic doing a course on Digital Entertainment Technology, programming and designing computer games.
Because of my wife’s and my poor health, I decided to retire at 6o years of age in 2002. I turned down offers of promotion immediately after my own graduation in 1984 and chose to remain as a classroom teacher without regrets.
Since my retirement, Kristy and I have been happily busy organising and taking part in social activities. We now have more time to spend on our spiritual journey. Life could not have been better. Like Philip and Priscilla, we are spending a lot of quality time together and with our friends and relatives. Best of all about retirement, we have quality sleep too without having to worry about getting up early to face all the work stresses of the day. Life now is one big holiday either abroad or right here in Singapore.
Greetings to all of you too – Charles, Joy, Mary, Tim, June and Chengpun (whom we have yet to meet). Stay healthy and happy in our golden years and be wealthy in friendship and love.
Love,
Robert & Kristy
dear Lawrence n Theresa,
it’s indeed a real paradox – although I love watching those violent wrestling shows on TV, your candid write-up touched n moved me.
through my interaction with fellow members, I know many of us will concur with you that “our happiness n destiny are in our own very hands”. you couldn’t be further from the truth!
It took me 18 months to make that move; to stop wallowing in self-pity n reach out. procrastinate no more, take that step, come join us! yesterday is dead and gone. let’s live for tomorrow. let’s be ourselves.
looking forward to meeting up with you, Lawrence n Theresa.
with kind regards…yours truly johnhowe
Truly and indeed….Robert & Kristy are another exemplary couple glistening with love and bliss for all to see and couples to emulate.
(I am waiting for another SHCian couple to show up and this guy really knows how to gyrate with his hips to throw Elvis off balance)
Dear Lawrence n Theresa
Let us, my spouse Alice and I, also congratulate both of you on your coming 20th Wedding Anniversary………and many, many years to come.
We have to acknowledge what our fellow Tim Liu says: “yes, I concur on the fact that both Philip & Priscilla are a wonderful happy & contented couple”
and “Truly and indeed – Robert and Kristy are another exemplary couple glistening with love and bliss for all to see and couples to emulate”
Alice and I totally agree with our Tim whole heartedly and let other loving couples come out and follow the above examples.
We really appreciate both of you, Lawrence and Theresa, that you have given a good thought about life after retirement. We have retired a few years ago, and have no regret about doing so, even part-time jobs been offered, we refused. Life is short, even though Govt may say life expectancy has been prolong, can live upto 85 years or 90 years. What you can do at that age, your hearts may be willing, but your legs cannot succumb to the strain.
TIME WAIT FOR NO MAN – You need not to have the 5Cs, to live life comfortably, or else you may have to see the pic “MONEY NO ENOUGH” -can’t bring wealth to the next world, you have to leave behind all the worldly goods. We are different from our forefathers’ time, as children nowadays can manage themselves very well.
So much have been said, but we still have to hear from Lawrence and Theresa about their hobbies. Your thinking of retirement in Malaysia may not be a bunch of roses, if you are quite used to fast life in Singapore, you will find life very dull – the Kampong Days of Singapore in the 1930s, unless you choose to stay in the heart of KL.
June Lim says: ” Love is such a beautiful thing esp. in the Autumn Years”. May we bring this to her: Try to treat every days in retirement years as SPRING TIME.
Hi Tim: U need not have 2 wait any longer lah, hehe.
RON N ALICE LAI
My dear Ron (and needless to say, Alice as well), I am so happy that you read me well and so it completes the jigsaw puzzle with the last piece found………or is there one more final final piece, something like TereNok………….?
Honestly, nothing pleases me more than to see happy vintage couples……and both are SHCians supporting & encouraging each other in SHC activities & functions.
Mary Chan Says:
October 7th, 2007 at 10:13 am
Hi Lawrence and Theresa.
If every couple thought and felt the way you’ve both expressed yourself, there would be fewer divorces and marital breakdowns.
Welcome
Mary
dear Mary,
We believe that marriage is a commitment
have you ever thought about it
when in your life time have you the honour and the seriousness of the situation, that you take the vow in front of families, friends, the government and the country .. to take care of each other till death do us part.
If one cannot even keep this single promise (infront of so many people) and just how many promises are made this way, than can anyone be trusted
this opinion applies only to me, as I do not have the guts to pass value judgement on others
marriage is not like a piece of furniture that you buy… you see it you like it, save enough money, buy it, then after awhile put it oneside
marriage is a dynamic relationship, it takes two to tango
I found the biggest mistake, in my life is that i use to think marriage is the end of the relationship but it is truly the beginning… and believe me it is a very very long road
like all task, you have to invest time and patience, to enjoy the fruits of your marriage
I think I begin to feel like preaching
I apologise but i take the vow of marriage very seriously
thanks
Ron Lai Says:
October 9th, 2007 at 6:13 pm
Dear Lawrence n Theresa
Let us, my spouse Alice and I, also congratulate both of you on your coming 20th Wedding Anniversary………and many, many years to come.
We have to acknowledge what our fellow Tim Liu says: “yes, I concur on the fact that both Philip & Priscilla are a wonderful happy & contented couple”
and “Truly and indeed – Robert and Kristy are another exemplary couple glistening with love and bliss for all to see and couples to emulate”
Alice and I totally agree with our Tim whole heartedly and let other loving couples come out and follow the above examples.
We really appreciate both of you, Lawrence and Theresa, that you have given a good thought about life after retirement. We have retired a few years ago, and have no regret about doing so, even part-time jobs been offered, we refused. Life is short, even though Govt may say life expectancy has been prolong, can live upto 85 years or 90 years. What you can do at that age, your hearts may be willing, but your legs cannot succumb to the strain.
TIME WAIT FOR NO MAN – You …..
Many thanks for your kind words
We live with the premise that everyone is beautiful and in every person there is goodness
while I was in my army days, I learnt alot
there was criminal in my platoon but he turned out to be the most loyal person I have ever met
I wish him well but that was many many years ago
I think where ever you live or decide to live, it is about the same, it is about adaptation
and being semi-retired or retired I think one has more time to understand the natives better, in this case Malaysia
the problem with singapore, we never ever compare apples with apples
we are actually by any criteria, a”developed” country and as such we need to come with a developed countries
it is too easy to look around and say we do not frank proverty but little do we ever realized that if you go around begging you will end up in some home or mental institution.
Even though the life expectancy is long now apparently to 80 – 85 years but this does not involved us because it reflects those born today
for us, many of us would be lucky to see 75 years
medical advances help but the question is what about quality of life … it is no use just living but so many people around you suffer not just financially but their lives revolves around you if you should fall sick in a bad way
Just not trying to negative but one must seriously give thoughts to all ISSUES, so that one can be truly free to semi-retire or retire
Both of us are seriously thinking of Malaysia my 2nd home program
this does not mean singapore is a bad place
when you are retired … what is the lost for trying …. it is time to be adventurous
any takers …..
Hi All,
Thanks for the kind words & encouragement.Will certainly “jia you”
I guess for you, June,”the romantic at heart”, it is “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”.
You are right.Holding hands is a very powerful and loving communication between a couple.
Sometimes Philip & I may just sit in front of the TV for more than an hour in total silence. But a simple touch of hands conveys all that we want to say.
I have met the loving couple,Ron & Alice.
Look forward to also meet Lawrence & Theresa, Robert & Christy, June,Charles, Joy,Mary and many many other Silverhairs together with their spouses.
Priscilla, let me put on my hunting boots this Saturday. If I see a desirable specimen, I will club him on the head and drag him by his toes into my cave. When he awakes from his coma, I will walk hand in hand with him to the next SHC function.
Shucks! I shouldn’t have let the TV repair man get away. And he was already in my cave! And that would have solved my TV woes for the rest of my silverhair years…
Haha, Joy.
I laughed out loud when I read your comment. ;-)
Hi Joy,
That reminds me of Flintstones.
Enough is enough 4 all you couples complimenting each other on your blissful marriage…tis n dat…I m truly happy for all SHCian couples in your happy marriages but can you all spared some thots for those who are less blessed…very demoralising indeed…I tink it is more appropriate that you couples have your own private sessions on this…SHC is a multi-status club..couples..divorcees..widow/ers..singles.. m I right Terence?
sgzitan comment #16 too arrogant n boastful…who dunno the facts of marriage…set aside from westerners n those who enter marriage for some evil purpose…who wld not wanna long lasting marriage till death do us part when they tie the knots…things does happen on their journey…don’t 4get we are all living in a fallen world…
We are all here to share friendship n common areas of interest in live…not focusing on your successful marriages…otherwise Terence shd divide his SHC Empire into 4 Kingdoms: BLISSFUL (couples)/UNFORTUNATE (divorcees)/SAD (widow/ers)/UNLUCKY (singles)so dat each group can focus on their own topics…
J.C.
Hi Guys
I m in total agreement wif Janet Chan’s sentiments. SHC is a platform created by our founder (n co-founders) 4 people from all walks of life 2 come 2gether 2 get 2 know more frenz. When talking abt sth subjective, we shd be mindful of “those ppl” who r not n oso those who r “mistered” n “missed”.
I m taking their stand 2 speak out bcos I think they deserve our encouragement n blessings but not ignorance n negligence.
Regarding the seemingly endless talk about “happy couples”.
I have kept my mouth shut until I read Janet Chan and Yew Kwong’s comments. They are very brave indeed to speak their minds.
I was once a “couple”, believing in the sanctity of marriage, trust, love, tolerance, companionship, blah blah blah. But to be asked,
“dear Mary,
We believe that marriage is a commitment
have you ever thought about it……………………(#16)to enjoy the fruits of your marriage”????!!!!!
What do you know about other people’s marriages to dare ask that question?
Yes, it’s preaching. Not only preaching, but ignorance and downright condescending and … yes smugness, if there is such a word.
When I made comment #3, I didn’t expect to get a lecture on “what marriage is”.
Please have some compassion and consideration for people who are not so “lucky” to be a “happy couple”.
By the way, there ARE people who are happier not being a couple. There ARE people who enjoy being single. Ther ARE people who are happy being with themselves.
Janet C,
I wont beg to differ but will simply differ.
This thread, started by Lawrence & Theresa, honours happy marriages. Other happy couples come in, too, with their exaltations.
Wont all these sharings of happiness make SHC a happier place, with the couple both joining as members and attending SHC functions together as they continue to join hands in life?
They who hv reasons and cause for celebration should not be stopped, esp in a thread they created and with the intent so manifestly clear. It must never be a case of “enough is enough 4 all you couples complimenting each other”……do let a thousand flowers bloom.
Likewise, the singles too shd share with all (not just with singles only) aloud and with aplomb how much more life they can find outside of a matrimonial union. Do dedicate a thread for this purpose.
Do believe in this : a single is not “less blessed” and so pls dont ever feel demoralised.
I hv shrugged off the idea of writing my profile (but will wait to write my memoirs) but do like to share a bit of my take here.
Divorced twice, I do feel very happy when I see happy couples, nvm that tinge of sadness deep inside. But I’ll never feel myself a lesser being with jagged edges.
I enjoy my singlehood and may hv less time for myself if I am married. Yes, there’re times I feel like holding a hand, and that isnt too big a problem when I remember I hv 2 hands……..
Thank you JanetC, Yew Kong and MaryC.
Who knows what goes on behind closed doors. The so-called “happy couples” may be living a make believe world with rose tinted glasses or like ostriches with their heads buried in the sand…good luck if they can carry it off to their dying days.
Are they really lucky?????? Lucky are the people who knows their own sum total first and foremost , and able to live and at peace with themselves…..single or otherwise.
Those who blare or toot out at how hunky dory their lives are, think again…..what exactly are you covering or hiding….the opposite of hunky dory????? Nothing in this world is perfect!!!!
After agreeing to the 3 above comments….this is my 2 cents worth……………Jie
Lawrence and Teresa,
My comment #3 was sincere and complimentary to both of you. I’m no “sour grapes” because my marriage didn’t survive more than 30 years, yes 30 years.
Yes, I still do feel a tug at my heart when I see happily married couples and I wish I had been one of them, BUT when I made the decision to move on, it was with no regrets.
I had expected you to accept my congratulations graciously instead of preaching and acting like Mr and Mrs Know-it-all.
I have friends who are and have been married for a long time, happily or otherwise, but have never had anybody been so arrogant about their “happiness” and so judgemental.
There, I’ve said what I wanted to say and I don’t wish to have any more conversation about this.
In the spirit of openess and frankness,all can speak clearly and loudly their minds.But let us all remember, language is a very sharp tool so use it with care. We are all here to make friends aren’t we.
Mary Chan
I apologise if I sounded like I am preaching but I did mentioned that withinn the posting that these criteria are me only and meant for no one
and these were my personal thoughts and I do keep telling myself that so that I will be strong and work hard in any relationship
everything on this earth is very dynamic and nothing is perfect and we try to make the best of it
it was one of those late nights that I turned into Mr. Philosopher when I heard over the radio (via internet) that in Hong Kong 30% of marriages end up breaking up
I was very upset because may be young people have a different perspective from us that is we try and try and it becomes impossible
I humbly apologise again if I sounded arrogant but as mentioned my comments were only meant for myself and if I did hurt you please do forgive me
Yes Charles,
We are all here to make friends or so it seems, but one can be selective about what kind of “friendship” one cultivates.
I abhore “one-upmanship” and “holier than thou” attitudes. >:(
That aside, I have had a good time meeting a lot of nice and interesting people here, singles, couples, men and women, at SHC and still wish to do so. :-)
A little incident like this will not cause me to bolt like some others did. ;-) hehe.
To ALL
if we did hurt anyone we apologised and seek your understanding and forgiveness
we were just sharing with all how in our own special relationship that help us keep going as a couple
we did not meant to hurt or preach but with the intention that we can share our own personal experience how we tried to keep a happy marriage
everybody has their special ways and perhaps we can learn from others here too (I am very sure of it)
I guess I thought I found a fellowship that we can be open and see different views and hope to learn from others, like we have when we read all the postings in various areas of this site
In this world we have happiness and sadness
if we only choose to see “happiness” and dont try to cure the “sadness”, soon or later the “sadness” will affect things you do
once again
we apologise and realized we should restraint on transferring our thoughts to words (even on the internet)
sorry ALL
There are beautiful couples out there,
There are ugly couples out there,
There are beautiful singles out there,
There are ugly singles out there.
In short, there are beautiful and ugly people out there.
I pray hard that I don’t cross paths with the ugly ones :-)))
If I should, I pray hard not to be affected by their ugliness.
Hi Lawrence & Theresa
It is so gracious of you to apologise for the things you said, which I felt was alright. And
I did notice the parts where you said it was meant for you only and that it may not be right for others.
When I read the comments relating to the same subject, I was really worried that it will become another “battle field”.
I am truly happy for all the loving couples because if my husband did not lose his battle to cancer, we would have been one of them. But fate did not allow us that. I am not bitter about it. So I really enjoy your sharings of your contented and fulfilling life together. I am envious but never jealous.
And for others, we will enjoy each others company and do fun things together. I am looking foward to the Games Day. Pot Luck and Talentime. So live and let live. To each his own.
Have a nice day everyone :)
Warmest Regards
Caroline Gee
Hi ALL,
My sincere apology for creating a spark…don’t mean to hurt anybody…just expressing my view at a low spirited point of time…promise n be rest assured my name will not appear again in any future comments except for registering activities…CooooooooooooooooL down pls everyone…otherwise Tim will not duet with me on Talentime’s day liao…um ho yi si…
Sori and hv a nice day everyone!
J.C.
Tim, I never been so agree with your point of view in your #comment 25. Yes, we should feel happy for the others happiness.
That’s why, when we are in a society, besides our own feeling, we should also care about the others. So I think JanetC, Yew Kwong, and Mary Chan’s comments are in their good-will to give some advice to Lawrence & Theresa and others happy couples, not complaint.
Lawrence & Theresa, you’re so understanding, I think your apologize will sure make the bad weather all over. Let befriend with each others in SHC
Another BIG Headache for Terence.
Comment #22 ,
Janet Chan Says:
October 11th, 2007 at 12:09 am …..Terence shd divide his SHC Empire into 4 Kingdoms: BLISSFUL couples)/UNFORTUNATE (divorcees)/SAD (widow/ers)/UNLUCKY (singles)so dat each group can focus on their own topics
That will DEFEAT the purpose of SHC objectives.
Hi everybody,
The SilverHairsClub forum is intended for SilverHairs to share our thoughts and activities, as if we are physically meeting in a real place.
Although I am travelling now, I felt I should say something. Despite the different opinions in this thread, I see maturity in the discussion, both by the Post author, and the Comment authors. I believe we should continue to be open and share our expressions with fellow SilverHairs. The club has only one age rule ie >45, and a few taboos. Nothing else. Charles has put a good point across. Language is sharp. And yes, Steven, we can have different views and activities, and yet be a part of the SilverHairsClub. I can only ask that we respect and understand each others’ views and opinions.
Lawrence and Theresa, you have inspired us with your thoughts. We have all made new friends. And, as the saying goes, nothing beats “meeting face to face”. We all learn from you too. Let’s move on with our lives.
Terence Seah
Hi Terence,
You are welcome.
As an SHC member,I feel there is a need for all of us to have a common goal to “sail” together to give more “joy” to others and also to participate in more conducive “sharing” amongst our SHC community through various views and activities
and NOT antagonizing /sabotaging one another by way of sensitive/sarcastic/undesirable
comments.
My two cents worth
Steven Chan
Once, Terence and I had 1 drink too many and we started ogling at boys & talking cock.
I asked him to stretch out his hands, wanting to advance the point that no 2 fingers are the same (but he advanced his last finger all the way into his nostrils, and, what he gotten out, didnt disappoint…….)
Anyhow, point is : long or short, each finger is purposeful.
So, the last finger shdnt deride the middle finger for being longer and seemingly more endowed cos the impact of showing the middle finger will be lost if they’re of the same length & size.
(Try levelling yr last finger the next time and you’ll probably turn yr sworn enemy to become yr sworn bro)
Likewise, Terence didnt need his middle finger to dig his nose (but may use it to dig yr nose).
So, if we’re blissfully married, we must continue to love our spouse and not take him/her for granted, and share the joy with each other as we share with friends (and friends shd clap, not rap, whether with 1 hand or into an applauses).
But if we’re single (in its broadest sense), so be it. We too will find peace and happiness, with absolutely no reason to feel inadequate. Or bitter.
Ultimately, married or single, we are like the fingers of the SHC hand without each & everyone, our grip & hold wont be quite the same. (But some finger nails will hv to be cut and I wont hesitate to do the manicure foc………….)
Janet, our song is on & we’re on song.
Andrew, this time you didnt say I looked it up from the internet…………….clever you !
Tim
I think you have some misunderstanding. If you see some of my writing saying somebody look up something from the internet. I don’t mean you.
So who is the people I pointed? he he.
Hi Janet C
Do not be discouraged if you kena “huntum”. This is where we share our views. It may not appeal to everyone but we are entitled to our opinions. We learn new things along the way. And I fully agree with Tim’s comments #25.
I was not hitting out at anyone, but just my point of view. Life will be uninteresting if we keep “ducking”.
We have said our piece so lets move on. Waiting to hear your duet song :)
Take care and Warmest Regards
Caroline Gee
I said “Andrew, this time you didnt say I looked it up from the internet…………….clever you ! ”
You clarified so shall I take back the “clever you”?
No, once knighted, it’s knighted and with yr clarification, you ‘re upgraded from Datuk to Tun Seri Amar.
(Terence reading, pls take note hor).
You’re restored back to my good books with the good boobs. If this is reason enough to rejoice, who will come to mind?
Heeee, Joy of cos……………..give her a call?
Finally after 42 posts, I just wish to add something. Isn’t a ‘profile’ supposed to just introduce yourself in the most brief way and not for giving opinions or self aggrandisement? Talk about your hobbies, likes & dislikes etc. If others read it & then give you comments -nice & good but spare all those ‘praising my own flowers that I sell’ (cantonese). Just be wary that words are ‘very powerful tools’, you can kill someone or elevate others and just spare poor terence the task of ‘refereeing’!!
We are getting so paranoid that we have to make a declaration first
these comments are purely for ourselves, if you do find it useful for your life, please do help yourself and we are happy for you and grateful that you found it useful too
We often have a tendency to see only apparent “BAD” side of a comment, if we takes things in the proper context, the comment often meant well BUT along the way it get misunderstood
The comment we made, which we again apologise was perhaps a little selfish on our part.
We basically have each other left and hence for the comment.
A few weeks ago our “daughter” had a very bad infection, we took her to the hospital but was told it was terminal and we took her home, the same night and placed her in our bed instead.
Both of us were by her side and we could see life was running our from her. We took turn to stroke her hair and telling her to brave and daddy and mummy will always be there even though she is coma
we hold her cold hands and pretended to be brave infront of each other
we sang her favourite song while her sleepy eyes could not even look up
I prayed so hard to take my life to give them to her but there were no answer
ALL the money we got, we just could not stop her from going away from us
we hope to be together when we finally meet be a family again
She left us very suddenly and we are still in denial and what is left in this world is both of us and that is all we have left for a family
hence perhaps, Mary Chan will forgive us for unknowingly hurt her
the comments was address to her but was not meant for you, Mary but because your comment was just so in line with what we want to say
whoever we got now, it doesnt really matter
love our family and our friends with ALL honesty and sincerity
time is very short and trust us,
we want to leave all those superficialities behind and move forward
even if we cant find true friends, we still have each other
We dont mean to tell it all but our apparent inappropriate and perhaps carelessness without care wanting to pass the message to everyone that
forget about the superficiality in life …
go for the real thing…. it is far more rewarding
may have hurt people along the way unknowingly
once again thank you for all your understanding
Hi All,
I think we shd clse this topic graciously aft all Lawrence & Theresa did offered their apologies not once but 3x which I am sure dat they r very sincere. Watever said cant be unsaid rite, so let it b lor.. life still goes on so be hapi n make more frens here, ok??
Lawrence and Teresa,
You have my condolences on your bereavement and I agree with Dolly. I had already ceased talking about it, ( #27).
Apologies accepted. Matter closed.
I am totally flabbergasted at the turn of events culminaing in the Tans’ apologies which are abolutely unnecessary & unwarranted in the first place.
Suffice to say that it was their profile – their home – and if anyone looking in didnt like what they see, look away, what right has one to say, stop the love making?
I didnt address the hosts in my first comment – unusual of me – cos there were things written which didnt walk up my alley.
Neither did I miss their desire to share the exuberance of a marriage they honour and will continue to nurture.
In their profile, the Tans told what they earnestly & honestly believe in. It may be a departure from the conventional what i do, my hobbies and I look forward to great friendship…….ad nauseum. It is their style; who are we to dictate?
In fact, I find it more abhorrent when diplomacy in the form of giving standard & populist answers crosses into hypocrisy, with everyone singing the same tune, invariably in high praises.
Are we happier and more satisfied now that the Tans are forced to tell us something tragic & heart-wrenching, something that will hurt them each time it’s revised & recalled?
In the last national survey on mental health, it’s said that 1/6 of our population has some degree of mental illness. It sends the shivers down my spine if they choose to congregate here………..
3 cheers to Tim. There is hope for SHC after all.
Heeee, Mr Food, many who had once cheered me now want to geld me so I prefer 3 beers from you (that might turn Terence into a green-eyed monster 1 more time………..)
Tim,
Perhaps they should geld you. Then you won’t come up with such ridiculous statements.
Guys should be so lucky to have me “tie them up….”
Ah tee ah, think carefully before you write such things, even in jest. Dennis has a wife and I am no desperado, not at all.
Yes, 1 in 6 could be paranoid, but isn’t it well known that the insane are the ones who claim they are not??
Aiyahyayaya Mary, you got everything stirred in a rojak pot lah…….the tie up thingy is in the BG walk, the geld is in this post but the hint of despair is in the pot-luck thread……
Seriously, I was intro to Dennis’ better half at the Capt’s party. I can vouch that she’s his very loving wife, and that’s why he has a lot of freedom born out of trust & mutual respect.
Heeee, I got no wife leh so I can hv a bit more liberty to feel desperate and feel that I am insane (which makes me not, according to yr theory…………….Wrong again?)
Dear Lawrence & Theresa,
We are very sorry for your recent loss.
Indeed it is during sad & painful times that a couple needs each other even more; to love, comfort and give each other strength to carry on.
There’s a saying,” A Joy, when shared, is doubled. A Sorrow, when shared, is halved.”
Friends can also be there for you during happy and sad times.
Your response has been very gracious. We respect you for your humility.
Hope that you will find many friends in SHC & enjoy one another’s warm frienship.
Philip & Priscilla Wee
Hi, Lawrence & Theresa,
I have a question wanted to ask you. But before that, I’d like to have a deeo apologize in advance, if I’m wrong. I mulled over for a long time whether I should ask the question, but at last, my curiosity win and decided to ask the question:
Is that the “daughter” you mentioned in your comment #43 is only your pet, a doy or a cat?
If I’m wrong, I would like to give my apologize here again.
But if I’m right, I think you’ve started a serious joke with us.
yes, am also wondering why the ‘daughter’ is in inverted commas? By the way you have both put across words, you certainly look forward to a ‘reunion’ some day. so, rejoice, for that surely would be a better place! if someone feels inclined to apologise because he/she is well mannered, civilized & cultured, and may have sparked some raw nerve, so be it! then who are we to comment whether its needed or not?
Yeung Andrew
we do not have any biological children but an adopted child
regardless we love her all the same
we have adopted her with the help of an agency when she was already school (most do like it but we didn’t)
despite the short time we had, she still address us aunty and uncle but we love her like mum and dad would
and that the reason for “daughter” just in case she may not be happy as she was still in contact with her biological parents living in another country
It seems the more we reveal ourselves, the more cynical and suspicious people get
It really saddened us, that as we approach our twillight years, we should being to “revert” to our childhood like mentality that is to trust and take people what they are
Perhaps, this truly is a wrong place for us.
God bless and wishing each and everyone a good, healthy and fulfilling lives
make each day counts
If we should have hurt anyone, please do forgive us, as we did not set out to hurt anyone
thank you
Hi, Lawrence & Theresa,
I apologize here for my own curiosity and bring up you agony again. My comment hurt you so much. If you leave SHC for my comment, I should have a deep regret in my heart.
Please stay, and befriends with us. Sorry again although it cannot do anything for my mistake.
Lawrence & Theresa, I come to know Andrew for a while and he is straight, shooting off from his mouth quickly but usually without malice.
SHC s a cross section of society. In here you’ll find all kinds, like those who rejoice at deaths bcos only then can they look forward to a reunion. Very cultured oddballs but they exist.
Pls be strong and be the happy couple you are.
Yes, Lawrence & Theresa, please do stay with us. Once you put a face to a name, and having met the person you will realize all of us are basically the same. We need friends, we need appreciation, we need understanding . I know AndrewY. He is indeed a wonderful person, rather frank at times but absolutely sincere and without malice.
Come join us for the walk at Botanical Garden tomorrow and get to meet some of us. I sssure you will be much more comfortable after that. cheers
Listen, Tim, the minute you are born, we all are heading towards death at some time or other. If you do have that kind of courage to rejoice for you or others before you close your eyes -you’re of a different kind and rightly so called ‘oddball’. So, to each his own and do have the courtesy to respect diversity. End of intercourse!
by the way I was echoing what the couple shared in #43 & I quote “We hope to be together when we finally meet be a a family again” so we are all ‘oddballs’ & rightly so as I share such sentiments -in a much deeper fashion! so there !
There is no right or wrong when it comes to opinion
so there is no hard feelings in fact it brought us back to reality
this website has many good people with kind thoughts
but it was a baptist of fire for us
we wanted to find some peace, a new life to move on and thoughts of moving to Malaysia was an excuse to leave the pain behind and seek distraction
we gave up our jobs because of this tragic incident that has taught us a very painful lessons
where is our (my priority) in this life
job, money, status, … I got them all damn wrong
it should have been family and friends first
now there are “two lonely people in the world” (AIR SUPPLY)
there is nothing wrong in clarifying and certainly we must also value different opinions
and that’s how we learn and change for the better
once again
the quicker we learn that everybody is beautiful, the easier and happier we will be
this will be our last entry
God Bless
Hi Lawrence & Theresa,
As mentioned before, we are looking forward to meet you at an SHC event.
Would you like to join us on SHC Games Day?
(Sat 20 Oct)
Philip & Priscilla Wee :)
Thanks Tim
Thanks Charles
Hi Lawrence and Theresa,
I can’t help stop the tears from my eyes after the misadventure you and your wife experiences on this forum
With good faith you have endeavour to join us hoping to find some of kindred spirit. None of us even had the chance to met both of you in person.
Both of you have gone to the extend of baring your souls. Instead of receiving you and Theresa with open hearts, we have begun to belittle your professing of your marriage vows and commitment to each other.
Some of us with noble intention have deride your declaration of faithfulness for each other. There is no right or wrong here. After all, this is the forum that you choose to share your profile with us. Because this is your forum, those who care to give comment must respect your openness to each other and not cast unwarranted sarcasms!
The hurt would have been forgiven but for the facts that insults was added to injury.
Dear Lawrence and Theresa, to err is human, to forgive divine. Please stay with us and let us be your bosum friend in this harsh world. Let not this be your ‘last entry’!!
It is a beautiful morning albeit warm and humid….Let’s enjoy the beauty…good day to hang out the clothes :-))) Here’s wishing you all SHC members out there, a wonderful afternoon ahead…JuneLim.
Hi June Lim,
What a lovely thought to start a day. :-) I think I haven’t met you yet, but I hope to one day.
You have a lovely day too.
MaryC
Look here, Gary Loke, bcos of yr desire to head for death the minute you’re born, each death occurring in yr household must be bringing you joy and gives you much to rejoice. That’s the strange culture of a very civilised you but make it exclusively yours to cherish & treasure.
You now admit that you’re of a different kind and I had so rightly called you an oddball.
But you’re more – an advocate & practitioner of the “humkarchan” (canto)culture. No matter how much intercourse and births thereafter, you want them to die so that you can rejoice. Very morbid you and so it explains why you carry the gray look which hides the hunmkarchan loke………
Btw, what do you teach in China?
Hi Lawrence & Theresa,
Pax et Bonum
We refer to your post #17
“Both of us are seriously thinking of Malaysia my 2nd home program”
If you are still interested,
we can be contacted by email: stmary33@yahoo.com.sg
Thanks
Philip & Priscilla Wee :)
Hi Lawrence & Theresa,
My wife and I share your personal thots on marriage as we are also living for each other in our twilight years since our children have flown out from the nest. Life at the moment is carefree as we also chose to retire early. Marriage is never easy with all the ups and downs. Since my wife’s stroke, we saw life in a different perspective. We learn to treasure and appreciate each other more.
Philip & Priscilla,
We are also seriously thinking of Malaysia my 2nd home program. We will contact you soonest at your given email address. Thks.
Thanks Tim, you are so educated & so cultured that you have to resort to vulgarity to converse with anybody. However, there’s someone watching from above! Not worth any further comments from me or I shall be as basic as you!!
Dont thank me bcos I wont accept thanks from a piece of insidious shiit.
A couple came in happily to share what they perceived as happiness in life but was forced to tell of the tragic. Sadly, they are gone.
ah loke (obviously a frustrated dysfunctional loke 7) rubbed his hands in glee as he extolled them to rejoice, what great joy it was to see a daughter dead………..and what a well-mannered, cultured & civilised humkarchan he has typefied himself to be.
I wont hesitate to call a spade, a spade and a vulgar spade, a vulgar spade. Nothing less.
Yes, up there someone is watching what you teach the kids in china esp when you make the debase your basics. The cerebral constipated has to be extirpated.